You have Got to be Kidding...

So, today, my boss volunteered me to attend a luncheon that the CPA firm down the hall was putting on. At this point, you're thinking to yourself "Self, lunch with a bunch of accountants sounds pretty boring, but at least she's getting a free lunch out of the deal." As Lee Corso would say, "Not so fast, my friends." Not only was this a lunch with a bunch of accountants, it was a presentation by 2 insurance agents. I'll pause while the absolute "tear your hair out boring-ness" sinks in...

Anyhoo, I was definitely not part of their target audience because they were talking about home owners insurance for houses where the value started at $1M and insurance for jewelry valued at more than $10,000. I wonder what their faces would have looked like if I'd asked about renters insurance, or car insurance for a 1997 Chevy Cavalier, or told them that my most expensive piece of jewelry is a ring that I actually found while on vacation in South Carolina.

Making matters worse, clearly, they did not receive a copy of my personal rider (required for all personal appearances, including luncheons with neighboring CPA firms) in advance. The following was on the menu for lunch- Chicken salad and/or egg salad sandwiches, Potato Salad, and the piece de resistance... yep, you guessed it, Dasani water. It was warm, served with a glass filled to the brim with ice. The only other beverage choices were caffeine free Diet Coke (what's the point of Coke without the sugar and caffiene) and Diet Lemonade. Those of you who know me, know I'm not kidding around about the Dasani water thing. It's absolute crap. I'd prefer tap water. For serious. (An aside, for some reason that reminded me of the the time when my Grandma told my Grandpa that the coffee he made "tasted like piss." His response, "How would you know?" :) But, I digress...)

To sum up: Accountants + Insurance + Boring small talk with rich people old enough to be my parents + unacceptable food/beverage choices = Pissy Ryan sitting at her desk eating her re-heated left overs wishing she had taken the day off.

More soon--
Ry

Song of the Day (because I feel like raging a little bit): "Smells Like Teen Spirit"- Nirvana