As of last week, I actually have a client. Seriously. Fortunately, she asked me "How long have you been working here" and I could truthfully answer her "About a year and a half." If she would have asked me "How long have you been a lawyer?" I would have had to tell her "About a week and a half" and I'm not sure that sounds quite as impressive. :)
How long until Notre Dame fans realize that everyone else in the country hates them? I mean, honestly, I know that people say that Michigan fans are arrogant, but I don't think the majority of them would assume that any coach in the country would want to take the Michigan job, no questions asked. (I, on the other hand, would take the coaching job, although I'd probably hold out a little while, just to make "Dollar" Bill Martin sweat it out...) Last night, Sven told me that the people who have turned down the ND job include Hayden Fox, from the famed 80's tv show, "Coach". Ha Ha Ha. :)
Perhaps the most profound theory that my friends have come up with is that Leonardo DiCaprio is the male Paris Hilton. You can't turn on the TV or look in a magazine without seeing them, but when you try to figure out why, you just can't. Looks? Nope. Charisma? Nope. Talent? Defintely nope. Rich? Now, maybe we're gettin somewhere...
On the way to my friend's wedding reception on Saturday, I stopped at Target to buy a card which was my best option at the time, even though I was already running about 10 minutes late. I was pleasantly surprised that they had an Express lane open, and that there was no line. I ran over, patting myself on the back that my trip had taken less than the 39 minutes I'd estimated when it happened. The kid working the register actually asked me, "Would you like to apply for a Target credit card and save 10% off of this purchase?" I looked at him in shock and said, "I'm buying a 99 cent card, what do you think?" He paused a few seconds and said, "Well, do you want to do the credit card or not?" In shock, I stammered that I thought I could afford the 10% so maybe I'd do it another time. Hello?!
Wouldn't it be great if people came with Certificates of Authenticity like autographed baseballs, sort of like a built in BS detector? That way, you'd know when people said things like, "I don't think that skirt looks too tight" or "No, really, I don't mind if you watch the Bachelor" or "I'll never be apathetic about you" you'd know if they were telling the truth. It'd probably save people like me a lot of time and effort anyway.
Julia Roberts named her babies Phinneas & Hazel. Phinneas & Hazel? Are you kidding me? I guess if you're the kid of a celebrity and you end up with names like that, you're probably not too pissed... after all, you could have been named Apple.
Do you think the song "Frosty the Snowman" will ever stop playing on a continuous loop in my brain? At least it's probably in your head now too...
-ry
